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CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #134

Last night I dreamt that Ellen DeGeneres was inexplicably hot for me. We were at some sort of party where she told her friends that she found me irresistibly sexy and that, despite being a lesbian, she wanted to do me. As for myself, I was torn. I'm a big fan of Ellen's. She's incredibly smart and funny, not to mention cute as the proverbial button and sassy as the equally proverbial all get out. I think my ambivalence stemmed from being confused about why, given her sexual orientation, she would be interested in me. Anyway, as the dream progressed Ellen made advances toward me that were, well... very sensual. My ambivalence did not stop me from doing a little smooching and copping a feel. She has a great body. Very lithe. And that was the end of the dream. Or all I could remember. Ellen, if this vanity card should get to you, please know that your passion for me was a beautiful and natural thing. And I thank you. P.S. Please don't tell my wife.

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1st Aired: 21 Mar 2005

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